Headache

im not going to say any names but somebody got me sick this weekend, so today i have been playing hookey. i did manage to go to my advisor appt. and i also managed to make it to work (which is where im at right now) but aside from that i ain't done shit all day. i threw my neck out on sat from holding my head weird to keep my wig from falling off (only to have some creepy baby rip it off) and then from spending a half hour with my head down the toilet puking. but aside from that i guess im good. i got $20 in a halloween card from gma westfall and last nite luke treated me to starbucks. i want to dress up for halloween tomorrow but im guessing my body wont make it. who wants to buy me a puppy for christmas? i'd actually prefer a mutt, so u could just pay for all the shots and i'd consider that a present as well. maybe a year's supply of dog food or something too. get creative.

Who Knew?

-puppy treats could taste so damn good, especially cheese flavored ones

-a record would be broken in springfield for the earliest snowfall ever this week

-you can ruin a hamburger (if becca cooks it)

-they make peanut butter without that nasty oil in it now and you can buy it for only a $1 more. it tastes delicious

- little redneck debbie joan who slept in a laundry basket as a baby would end up living in chicago wearing power suits

Well, you know now

I Have Decided

in a conversation today with the best sister ever i was told that i might like living in the southeastern united states. but i havent ever really been to these states (or for that matter most of the country) so i wouldn't know. i therefore have decided that sometime within the next 10 years i am going to travel to all 50 states and decide if i like one better than illinois (which i thinki will). hell maybe i'll even get a camper and a dog and do it like travels with charley (a book by john steinbeck that no one's probably heard of). if u want to join me let me know.

Next Time it Won't be Cooked!!!

My how I love SIU! Thank God for 28 year old Seniors. If it weren't for them we would have no one to represent our true student body (except those lowlife losers who try to get you to vote for them every semester by giving you a sucky piece of candy).

Things I've Learned in the Past Month

1. apparently you can get out of a speeding ticket by asking the officer to cut the dialogue and just give you the ticket already. also make sure to add in that you're in no mood to talk to anyone after spending the day with your mom and you're in no mood to come up with excuses for your driving

2. my roommate will fuck me if i buy him a bottle of absolut. one of my other roommates has volunteered to pay for the bottle of absolut.

3.you can still get lost (if your name is becca) taking a trip that you've done for 4 years. super excellent. (deb-mom just called me to apologize for cussing at me earlier today and used the phrase, "I hope you can ever forgive me for this")

4. everybody seems to think that deborah is an ugly name. i think we even got mom to finally agree on this one. i can tell right away that a relationship with a guy isn't going to work if they always calls me becca.

5. dont ever go to a tailor in carbondale. it will undoubtedly lead to some sort of incident that will leave you frightened and bewildered, and while these incidents generally lead to good stories, sometimes these carbondale tailors can cross the line by uncrossing their bras and nobody (well maybe luke) wants to deal with that.

6. a lot of shit has happened in springfield that I was completely in the dark about until this weekend. why mom doesn't tell me these stories instead of talking about all the yardwork she did that day and what type of cookie she baked i dont know. perhaps this is where i get my excellent story telling ability from (if not DEFINITELY gma perry)

-the whole city has gone smoke free which has caused a huge uproar. im very surprised at this one-never thought they'd actually get that passed

-the owner of china buffet got arrested for operating a slave ship. apparently all of those workers were actually illegal immigrants (shocking) and weren't getting paid for their work. he may have even beat some of the workers with a wet noodle (probably lo mein resembling). i am sad because this china buffet had the best fruit in town. their sushi left a little to be desired (seriously who eats raw fish off of a buffet) but the fruit was always good. apparently everyone in the world but me had already heard about the china buffet controversy (except my little friend at la bamba who pretends that he can't speak english and charges sandy extra for her nachos because she refuses to go on a date with him)

7. kimonos like ketchup

8. it hurts when a five year old kicks you in the shin

9. you can go to the doctor simply to get out of writing a paper and actually have the doctor discover you are sick. it's up to you to decide whether you actually buy the medicine or not.

10. i am fatter than mom was when she got married. i guess she didn't have the beer belly.

the westfalls are hairy girls

today while out in the sunlight i noticed that i am currently proudly sprouting three dark hairs on my right big toe. i decided to pluck them mainly not because im embarrassed of my big toe hair but b/c im curious to see whether the hair will grow back and if it will be stubbly (which would be quite funny). guess we'll have to wait to find out. but for now i can report that plucking ur toe hair hurts just about as bad as breaking ur toe (which i think i just did). while writing this my pizza rolls in the oven burned but im still eating them. i yelled out loud at my pizza rolls for deciding to burn themselves which my new roommate overheard and she gave the wall the crazy look (but if u ask me she's the crazy one giving the wall facial expressions and such) i then said "lunch is served" in my head and realized no one ever says that. people say "breakfast is served" and "dinner is served" but i dont think i've ever heard "lunch is served". yesterday i tried to flick ashley off with my middle right toe but i couldn't so i think i re-broke that one sometime since spring break without even realizing it. im kinda disappointed but what can you do? o yeah and my summer so far is going ok. i guess some people may want to know that.

Nicknames I have Had

Chunk n Flow
Re-Rebecca
Smartgirl
Bocca
Motormouth
Blanket
Squirt
Reborcia I
Sunshine
Trouble
Becca Sue
Gretl
Squirrelmaster
Vicki
Peach
Little Debbie
Puppy Westfall
Rebecky
Chubocca
Chewey
Bubble Girl
Reba
Grandma
Susie Q

probably am leaving some out that i cant remember. u get extra credit if u can match more than 10 nicknames to the person(s) who call(ed) me it

Quaker Rice Snacks

Quaker Rice Snacks are about the best damn snack food imagineable i dont care who u are you will enjoy quaker rice snacks!!!!!! if i have to choke them down ur mouth....the only downfall of quaker rice snacks is that they are so good i can't get enough of them. cheese + styrofoam who knew it could be so addicting. every time i buy a bag at $2.50 at walmart i wait two days to open the little brewt and then it's like b-bye that very second. i could easily eat five of these bags in five seconds because i dont think they have any calories whatsoever and thus i never get full/tired of having my fingers encrusted with powder cheese. i really should stop buying them altogether but i just cant help giving into my little quaker rice snacks!

Evidence that I am the Strongest, Coolest Person in the World

People often ask me, "Becca, how do u keep ur cool?" and i reply (with newspaper ink all over my hand) "Well u know some people are just born like that"

they used to call me the squirrel master. im going to be 21 in 10 days, 5 hours, 12 minutes and 25 seconds.

today janell said, "o damn i cant open this apple juice" and i said "hey give it here" surely enough, i got the specimen to open

Watch out for squirrels on campus

making out with a bag of chex mix, complete mayhem, even murder of man's best friend. what beasts!

-on a sidenote im very proud to attend the only university in the world that officially doesn't have a library

Question

does anybody actually read/enjoy the links to weird sites and stories that i put up? or should i just stop putting links to them?

Robbery at the L.P.

so last night a guy got robbed at gunpoint at our apartment complex. and then he was shot in the ass. makes me feel real safe. of course i still feel safer walking to lewis park than i did the house on chatauqua and i never walk around the area he was at by myself when it's late at nite b/c it's dark and there's always people lingering around there. but wow still what can i say. carbondale is the fucking ghetto. am i terrified to still live here? not much more terrified than anywhere else in this town. i knew kids who got mugged freshman year over at the towers.

Last night

all in all, last nite was pretty fun and very eventful. this usually seems to be how nights that we have no idea what we're going to do develop.

first we hitched a ride to fratsby's from my neighbor who keeps hitting on me even tho he just broke up with his fiance (who still calls him her boyfriend) and i have told him about a thousand times i just wanna be friends but janell and keith dont care about my personal life and like to get free rides places. so we hung out with him for an hour or so then he didnt want to leave with us. none of janell's dancers ever showed up so we followed a rugby player over to stix and paid cover (and since when did stix start charging cover) only to walk inside and see about four people in the entire bar at midnite.

so then we walked over to sidetracks where we spent the rest of the nite. u couldnt even walk at sidetracks b/c there were so many people but at least there were people. this prooved to be an advantage as it allowed janell and i to dance rape all the guys without even moving around. it also meant that a certain ato named steve who's majoring in hospitality and tourism could get completely naked for ten minutes without any of the bouncers noticing. janell took some pics and there has been some discussion of creating a website entitled "steve's weiner.com" eventually he did not get kicked out (if u would have seen this body there would have been no complaining) he just decided to put his clothes back on after one of his friends convinced him it might be a good idea. that may have been the highlight of my night except for the events at don taco.

while waiting in line for the bathroom this other frat boy who boasted that he was wearing $300 jeans that looked like they were from old navy started talking shit to me and janell. when he tried to break into our bathroom while janell was peeing i got pissed, slammed open the door, and punched him in the face before he could even realize that i had opened the door. then he proceeded to bite my pinky and im telling u this hurt worse than when one of our dogs have bitten me in the past (probably b/c i was drunk tho). i also was afraid that i had broken my hand in the process of hitting him. then i slammed the bathroom door again and locked it while he continued trying to literally break the door down fun, fun. he wanted to beat my ass (and yes even tho im a girl) except his friends were laughing hysterically about the situation and told him not to. i actually think i managed to hurt him a little bit b/c i caught him off guard. at any rate when janell was finished pissing we literally sprinted over to the don taco line of food ordering where keith was and clinged onto him for dear life. i was scared shitless last nite but its pretty funny to think about it now. the asshole deserved a punch of the face for how he was acting anyway. and keith could have easily kicked his ass had he tried to do anything.

There She Blows

some important things you should (or should not) know about:

1. im getting addicted to coke, coca cola that is. have had 3 today. and yes, i know this is very bad but i cant help myself

2. today i was running late and did not have time to brush my teeth before i went to the writing center so i stuck a piece of gum in my mouth. and then for the next four hours i sat around thinking about how gross my teeth felt and how i couldnt wait to get home to brush them but then once i got home i waited two hours before i actually brushed them. (i was eating during this time tho)

3. just read in national geographic today that crows are one of the smartest animals in the world-even smarter than chimpanzees and definitely smarter than any bitch who decides to get up in my grill

4. yo momma so stupid when she was pregnant with you she ate baby food!

5. when someone exclaims "there she blows" when they open a bathroom stall to go in, but turn around and walk out instead u should try to keep ur curiousity at bay (trust me on this one)

6. number 1 reason why i like lewis park so much: the thousand dollar fireworks display we got on sat. too bad the police didnt like the fireworks as much as i did. o yeah and also today at 3 in the afternoon im driving thru and there is a huge flood of water in the middle of the street. i roll down my window and ask the guys next to ashley's apt "what the hell is this" and they say "it's a waterpark what the hell does it look like. put on ur swimsuit and play with us" then i see two firemen fucking with the hydrant next to our apts. laughing at what the guys told me. still dont know exactly what that one was about. i imagine somebody lit a dumpster on fire.

my favorite part of last nite

after several hours of drinking: the guy who bought my drinks the nite before and treated me to steak n shake (a debate over what he really wants) comes over to my apartment only to find keith massaging my feet. needless to say he left within a couple minutes. good thing he didnt come over five mins prior, though, cuz he would have seen an ass massage in the works, and i dont know if i could have made a recovery from that one.

how to fold a t-shirt

deb-is this how old navy did it?

Take a Walk in My Shoes

so today Janell and I were discussing how i had to make an appointment with health services over the toe i impaired while on spring vacation and it led to an interesting question:
just how many foot problems do i have????
so just for ur entertainment value and also b/c im a loser i have decided to make a list of foot problems that i currently have. now mind you, i said current problems, it would be too difficult to come up with a list of all the foot problems i have had in my lifetime. just the broken toes index would take at least a page and a half (altho starting with a fun story of when i was a very hyper four years old i jumped from my parents bed onto the vacuum cleaner--turned out not to be such a good idea) without any further ado, here is the list:

(Red the color of pain)
1. yellow feet syndrome-this happens when it is cold and wet outside and no matter how much insulation my feet are given, they undoubtedly loose circulation, turn yellow and remain numb for up to three hours after spending 10 minutes walking outside.

2. a broken toe (at the bottom) that still hurts to walk on after breaking it over two weeks ago on spring break

3. a huge bump occurring on the same toe (but at the top on the other side) where i stubbed it the next day on the couch. this bump also hurt and last week i went to the free nurse at the student center and she verified it was not a corn but i should go to a real doctor about it

4. a split toenail also from spring break week when i somehow cut it on the refrigerator door. that's right, the refrigerator door. yesterday i spent 10 mins fucking with the nail so that it does not become ingrown

5. the good 'ol stress fracture ive had for awhile now that is the result of 5 years of waitressing. i also have it b/c according to my xrays my fourth toe bone that goes into the foot is slightly thinner then the rest of the bones (this is something genetic. of course our family has great genes when it comes to just about anything u can imagine) and therefore more susceptible to stress.

6. the tendinitis i have in my heel now as a result of changing the way i walk to compensate for the stress fracture. now i just cant walk at all. this is why i had to take 2 weeks off of work at bob's last year and walk on crutches for a day

7. ankle weakness (yes im aware my ankle is not my foot) resulting from the orthopedic inserts i have to wear for my stress fracture. i have to wear them to support my stress fracture but they dont give enough support to the rest of my foot or my ankle. every time i have to walk on hard surface stairs with shoes on, my ankles buckle and i barely make it down without falling. i am supposed to see my podriatrist about this in the summer. when i called the nurse about it, she laughed and said, "o we get that all the time" seriously wtf. it's a good thing my pod is hot as hell (o and i assure u he is-mom always comes with me to google at him)

-on a sidenote that relates to this topic ashley and luke were being assholes last nite asking me why i dont dress up like a girl. which hello id say im fairly girly on the girl spectrum but according to them i should paint my nails, wear lip gloss at all times, and sport high heel type shoes that i can't walk in. well guess what: there is a reason why i only wear tennis shoes. (see above)

Finally I have been Helped

beer for toads

Just call me leather skin bubble lady

aaaaaaaaallas! i am back from the sunshine state. i must say i really dont want to be here right now. i had a fantastic vacation and was about ready to ask what courses florida university offered when petit walked upstairs to tell me the car was all packed. ....i cant give all details relating to the trip so if u want to hear all the crazy stuff you'll just have to ask BUT here is a brief summary of the events: the apartment we stayed at ended up being pretty much a condo with a pool and hot tub and (being the girl) i either slept on the couch or with rob every night instead of the floor. and the ocean was (barely) warm enough to go in-so all in all, the trip was a lot better than expected. and nobody got on each other's nerves too bad until the car ride back when chris said keith and i were acting like brother and sister. considering we had no radio/cd player, sat in rush hour traffic, waited 20 mins at a tollbooth b/c the car in front of us was retarded, i could barely reach the gas pedal, and a circuit went out so the dash lights and back lights went out and we had to pull over to fix it, im considering there was reason for why we were at each others throats. and because he's a jackass. some events of break:

-we didnt ever go to the bars but got drunk several nites. one nite in particular everyone was sloppy i ended up breaking my toe dancing.
-first nite we were down there ended up going to hooters along the beach and keith was so smashed that he was doing calistenics on the railing while we waited two hours for a table
-went to the hot tub at the apt one nite and i got bit by a mosquito. forehead swelled up the size of a golf ball. im sorry to report there are no pics of this (at least to my knowledge)
-tried to kidnap a goose two nites. the second time one of the guys we were with managed to grab onto one by its neck
-these geese look like roosters and apparently are endangered and very protected
-someone turned their sprinklers on us
-keith and i got SUNBURNT on tue so bad we couldn't be out in the sun for the rest of the trip. im still pretty red but finally healing to the peeling process and was lucky enough only to get a few blisters.
-had about a million other injuries/allergy attacks throughout the trip but honestly if u know me there's no point in mentioning them

Good Stories?

no not really. im sorry. went home this weekend and i have to say it's the first time i think ive been homesick in two years (and freshman year i didnt really miss home i just hated being at school). dont really know why i feel that way. but i do. dont really know why im writing a blog about nothing-i guess so u know (secret admirer) what ive been up to. we finally met the neighbors for real to the left of us last week. hung out with them for several hours and (hormones will be hormones) i already have called dibs on two of the six that were out there. i doubt anything really will happen, but its just natural to point out which ones i would be interested in if the situation presented itself. one is real cute and the other is real cool but not too cute. he's my favorite. we bonded together by going to the liquor store. (hopefully they're not reading this right now-not that they have this address or that they even know much more about me than my first name but maybe i should be more conscious of what i post online). i guess thats all im going to write about for now. if u have any ideas of something more interesting that i could write about, let me know. and everybody wish hillary a happy birthday. she's going to be 29!!! today only one year left!!!

Hillarious!

hillary is reading a new book and has been posting some of its "inspirational" parts. i'd highly recommend clicking on this link and getting more in touch with feeling better about urself. on a sidenote, hillary, my prettiest toe is also my index. this toe on my right foot has a blister that boasts a truly gorgeous rosy hue. i dont think u could even achieve this color if u were to slap ur cheeks roughly 48 times in the freezing cold.

My apologies (as if anyone cares)

i have been rather busy lately, or according to my low standards of what being busy consists of. i cant even remember the last day that i didn't have at least a few hours of homework-probably was a couple of weeks ago. i apologize for not keeping my audience (deborah) informed on my activities. here is some news:

1. im starting to actually tutor people next week on their writing-no more just observing sessions for me. im pretty nervous considering we all know im about the bluntest person in the world and dont have much experience with giving people nice criticisms. idk how successful this will be, but in the long run, i think it will improve my abilities to interract with people. for example i will learn how to talk like mom's cult recommends (instead of saying why did u do this, i have to word it friendlier-if thats even a damn word)

2. spring break is march 11 and i was planning on going home for a few days, rebonding with roxeanne, seeing brody etc. however i just learned after a TWO HOUR conversation with gma that that's when the family's going to the grand canyon. i have been invited to go, but somehow my idea of a break does not consist of hanging out with my sickly grandparents and my mother 24/7 for an entire week no matter how much i love them. so maybe i'll go down to florida with keith after all. or maybe i'll go up to chicago to see deb for a few days, but i doubt she has time for this. come to think of it i could block out keith's annoying ass and his friends if i were getting a tan (not that i dont love him) (not that my body could ever aquire a tan).

3. bashley's 21st bday is sun/mon so i imagine i will be staying in tonight to do all the hmwk that is due mon-wed. wed is included b/c i will be so hungover on tuesday from going out both sun and mon that i will not want to do all of my hmwk. it's midterms damnit. i have not yet finished his stupid bday present, and i dont think i will. all i can say is he better fucking like it cuz i dont ordinarily put forth an effort in people's gifts (deb has yet to get her bday present from me and her bday was december-but i claim this is b/c she was supposed to buy a sweatshirt and i was supposed to give her money. maybe i'll go to the mall this weekend) it's another kid's 21st bday fri/sat so i know i wont stay in on sat. i swear its soembodys 21st bday every weekend since the semester began. by the time it gets to mine, im going to be all partied out. for some reason i dont enjoy drinking as much as i used to. i can guarantee u it is not b/c i am growing up.

4. its that time of year again when i wear the zip up sweatshirts as coats to class. i often wonder whether it's best to zip up the sweatshirt halfway, all the way so the t-shirt is completely covered, or to not zip at all. usually its still too cold in the morning so i have to opt to zip it up all the way and i feel this makes me look like a dork (a westfall). any advice from u fashionistas on whats the best way to wear a zip up?

the weekend

internet addiction

so im driving about 4 mph on campus tailgating this truck b/c he has the audacity to give pedestrians the right of way. then i notice that his license plate is from florida and guess what the hell it reads: the sunshine state...visit florida.com that's right folks, florida has put their website for state tourism on their license plates.

So Funny I could not make this up

this is one of the first times ive actually laughed hard at a webpage on the net. it posts all the crazy items that are auctioned on ebay. and this one was my favorite:

SUPER BOWL HERE WE COME!!!!

So you want a hotdog from the NFC CHAMPIONSHIP GAME….how about a piece of history from the SUPER BOWL GAME????

What could be better than owning a hotdog from the Seattle Seahawks vs the Pittsburg Steelers Super Bowl Game?

We will be attending the 40th Super Bowl game in Detroit Michigan on February 5th. Because of the interest you have shown, in the Seahawks, we will be bringing back an original Super Bowl hotdog from Fords Field. This auction will include one hotdog, vacuum-sealed and frozen, a picture of us purchasing the hotdog, and ten random pictures taken the day of the game. Not only will these pictures show proof that this hotdog was purchased at the Super Bowl but will also give you a piece of the action.

For those of you who collect football memorabilia, what a great conversation piece to add to your collection.

This is a piece of history that will never be forgotten by all Seahawk fans.

GOOD LUCK SEAHAWKS
THE 12TH MAN IS WITH YOU.

SERIOUS BIDDERS ONLY PLEASE!!

(so far 30 people have bid on it and the price is at $72!!!!)

I know i never post any pics and there really is no rhyme or reason as to why i posted them today. except that the superbowl is less amusing to watch when ur sober and rather than trying to beat my superbowl party experience last year ive decided to stay at home and surf the net (cuz i have a lot of homework i should be doing). the main reason why i do not want to go out is b/c i dont think i could make it partying four nights in a row.

RECAP OF THE WEEKEND:
-thursday went to rugby party where keith as part of his hazing chugged half a bottle of wild turkey and drank a few cups of beer. ended up holding his hair back that night (he has a crooked mohawk now used for "intimidation"). sadly he was not the most drunk person at the party. some guy who nobody claimed to know was acting like mr. peepers from snl and banging on the front door of the apt for a half hour like a madman...i cant describe it much further by using words
-fri celebrated ziggy's 21st bday. was peer pressured into motorboating vanessa's boobs, and im told there are pics of this act. went to copper for a half hour and fell over at least 20 times bootygrinding. then left cuz maggie speaks sucked and really is i think the worst band ive heard play at copper, exept for maybe the michael jackson cover band. havent danced like that in months and my legs were sore the next day
-sat ate lunch at porcias grandmas house and it was delicious. didnt actually go to polar fest cuz i didnt want to. janell went for a while and then followed us to "club sin"-hence the pic. she knitted the scarf herself. it was freezing sat nite and my face got red from waiting in line at carbos for just a few mins, so there's no way i would have made it at pinch. still had a pretty good nite hanging with porcia altho she did get sick at the end of the nite. i hope u feel better pooky!

animals love me 

when its cold outside 

the gag reflex

this may sound disgusting to some of u but i have this uncontrollable gag that comes sometimes when i eat food. most of the time it's when im feeling ill or hungover or im eating gross food and have to force it down. but not always. and with this "gag" comes a retching noise like im throwing up. janell thinks its funny idk what YOU think. but i was just thinking about it cuz im eating my lunch now and i just gagged and janell wasnt here to hear it.

observations ive made in the last week

1. some guys buy girls drinks at the bar to get their attention. others paint themselves blue head to toe, reek of formaldahyde, and somehow successfully get a random hottie at the bar to go on a date with them.

2. tonsil doctors lie. they just like the money they get from surgery. i already have a sore throat.

3. on an average day i eat a bowl of cereal 1.5 times

4. sometimes when i have a quiet moment i turn to look down on roxie and realize shes not here. then i say "hi roxie i miss u" in my head and she hears me in springfield and barks "i love you rebecca woofhall"

5. four's a bad number to end a list on

famous person quote of the day

"I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph."

-Shirley Temple Black

well i relieved some stress laughing about the stupidity of this so i guess it works

a $17 book! only in america can that guy get published when real writers and poets desperately try to get published for years

Don't lie unless you're not going to get caught

As some of u folks may recall about a month ago seth egged my car and apt front door as a part of a day long war i had with the assholes of 18E. when i yelled at him and told him his hateful acts were not funny, he proceeded to say that he called the 1800tbsfunny line and they had told him it was quite hilarious.

somehow i always knew he was lying, so that night i got online and posted the story of him egging on tbs' webpage. today they emailed me back, rating the story a 1.2 on a scale of 1-5. 1 being "pathetic" and 5 being "very funny". apparently i am right once again. if u'd like to see the story posted online go to the link above, scroll down to bottom of page and click the box that reads "rate it". im third down on the right side of the new page that pops up.

MAN DATES GAL ON INTERNET FOR SIX MONTHS -- AND IT TURNS OUT SHE'S HIS MOTHER!

i really couldnt make up a story better than this! make sure u read the ending of the article there's a twist u dont expect.

Quote of the day

"Bye, sweetie, you have a good day!!! Goodbye, precious-precious!!! You guys can figure out who's who."

-Mom saying bye to the dog and I as she leaves for work.

What is the limit to our dreams?

This morning I had a dream that seemed to last very long. It had every detail imagineable, and I'm telling you it would have taken literally hours for all parts of the dream to actually occur in real life. Then Mom woke me up and I realized I had only been asleep for five minutes. How is this possible? I believe this means that my subconscious has a great imagination, one that knows no restraint of time--seconds, minutes, years of a lifetime have no value. So I wonder maybe this power is secretly lying in all of us, in our most innate and natural selves. Maybe that is who we are all meant to be until some restraint in life brings us down. Think of how you thought about the world and all the things you were going to achieve when you were five years old. I know as an adult I was going to be a doctor, a vetrinarian, a mother of 20 kids, and a school teacher just to name a few. If I can do over a 100 things in my sleep in five minutes, perhaps there is no limit to what I can accomplish. Time may not play as crucial of a role in our success as we all think it does. My guess is a lot of factors are only factors we allow to weigh in on our lives. So I ask all of you: what is the limit to your dreams? I have none.

THINGS THAT ARE HARD TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK:
Indubitably
Innovative
Preliminary
Proliferation

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU’RE DRUNK:
Specificity
British Constitution
Passive-aggressive disorder
Loquacious transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU’RE DRUNK:
Thanks, but I don’t want to have sex.
Nope, no more booze for me.
Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
Good evening officer, isn’t it lovely out tonight?
Oh, I just couldn’t. No one wants to hear me sing.

WHY ARE THERE NO AVAILABLE MEN WITH TONGUE RINGS???

this sad fact has recently come to my attention and since realizing it, the idea has really taken full possession of me. i can't understand it. tongue rings are great inventions of mankind, and it seems like nobody gets pierced there anymore. i had a shot with somebody last year with one (and a HOTTY i might add) but he turned out to be a little too sensitive (understatement) for me and considering he lived just two doors away and was always making love to janell's mind, i decided it wasnt all that good of an idea to get involved. so i still every now and again obsess about boys with tongue rings. janell and i have decided we're going to try to get a club with siu guys with tongue rings started and maybe invite them all to a party at our house. i think it's a great idea. too bad nobody will probably show up. keith has suggested that i take a metal detector to the bars.

Happy New Year

so i checked hillary's site today and of course she hasnt posted anything in over a month, but paul did, so i went to his blog. he had an interesting post about resolutions, and inspired me to come up with a list of my own. so here they are in no particular order:

1. get a 4.0 spring sem
2. find a boy with a tongue ring who likes to buy me drinks
3. get a job
4. go to europe this summer
5. master the art of cooking omelettes and fried eggs (the top is always so runny)
6. start doing yoga
7. slouch less b/c according to my dr. during a random physical, it's causing me back problems
8. go to class more often

What are ur resolutions????

A Riddle for You

There is a common English word that is nine letters long. Each time you remove a letter from it, it still remains an English word - from nine letters right down to a single letter. What is the original word, and what are the words that it becomes after removing one letter at a time?

The answer will be posted in a week if nobody guesses it.

im starting to feel better and i can talk for several mins without it hurting too bad. maybe i'll wear clothes tomorrow.